More Help For Katrina Victims

Benefit Concerts Planned for Katrina Victims | BCBeat: "Benefit Concerts Planned for Katrina Victims"

The entertainment industry is already gearing up to help the victims of Hurricane Katrina, with everyone from NBC to MTV planning televised fundraisers this weekend. Check you local listings for these opportunities to be entertained and to help those who need it.

Help For Victims Of Katrina Coming In Many Forms

Jerry Lewis Shares Fundraising Efforts | BCBeat: "Jerry Lewis Shares Fundraising Efforts"

The veteran of years of telethons, Jerry Lewis has announced that $1 million of the money raised this year in the annual Muscular Dystrophy Labor Day Telethon will be sent to help victims of Hurricane Katrina.

According to Lewis, ""If you want to send me 20 bucks for my kids, send 10. Send the other 10 to these people in this trouble."

That's how to help.

So THAT's What They Look Like...

http://www.heinousbrains.com/junk/5MenInALimo.mov

Click on the link above to see the video.

You know those deep, rumbling voices you hear in movie trailers? Or the signature voice for every Disney promo? What if you stuck them all into one short film?

That's what you get with the film linked above. It's hysterical!

Real-Life School of Rock (from BCBeat)

Real-Life School of Rock | BCBeat

Remember the recent movie "School of Rock" with Jack Black? Well, VH1 thought it would be a cool idea to see if they could take it the next step. So they've enlisted the help of rocker Gene Simmons (the long-tongued dude from Kiss) to turn a classroom of kids into a rock band. Hilarity ensues.

Ken Jennings Gets His Own Column

Jennings Hits the Newsstands | BCBeat:

"Jeopardy champ Ken Jennings will write a column for Mental Floss magazine, a publication that claims to 'take the chore out of learning by presenting information in a way that's quick, simple, quirky and fun.'"

Looks like Ken Jennings has scored again. The column he will be writing for Mental Floss magazine will be like playing the Kevin Bacon game. Give Ken two disparate items, and he will try to link them in six steps or less.

There was a series of TV programs a couple of years back called "Connections" that did this same kind of thing on a bigger scale. This might be a fun gig for ol' Ken, and might prove amusing.

I Want My Air Back

This post is likely to piss off smokers. Unfortunately, there are a few in my family. Sorry folks, I've gotten fed up.

At what point do we finally get it through everyone's head that non-smokers shouldn't have to endure the smoke of others? Dana Reeve, Christopher Reeve's wife, and a lifetime non-smoker was diagnosed this week with lung cancer. LUNG CANCER. She has never smoked.

Sure, the argument will be made that there were other possible factors, that second-hand smoke can't be blamed for it, etc. It's all crap.

I know it's tough to quit smoking, and many smokers have gotten relatively considerate about their habit around non-smokers (this includes the majority of my family).

No, where I get hacked off is places like in my car. I don't smoke. So why whould I have to smell someone else's smoke in my car!?!? I'm not talking about a smoker in my car. I'm talking about the jerk in front of me who is hanging the butt out the window and blowing his smoke out. Why, you may ask? So that the smoke doesn't stink up their car. So that their clothes don't smell like smoke.

The tacit implication is that smoke smells like crap. They don't want it in their car or their clothes. So instead, they'll force me to breathe it.

Here's an idea - roll up the freakin' window and inhale deeply. It's your smoke - enjoy it. But leave it in your car. You say it'll reduce the resale value of your car? How about the future value of my lungs? I frankly don't care how much it depreciates your car.

I see the same thing at work. Everyone knows that casinos are generally a smoker's paradise. But our poker room, like many, is non-smoking. Of course, there are no special ventilation systems, no hard walls to keep out the smoke. But the area is pretty clearly delineated. So what do the smokers do? Stand by the delineating wall, smoke their cigarettes, and blow the smoke back into the room. When you ask them to stand back to smoke their cigarrettes, explaining that it is a non-smoking room, after all, they look at you like you just told them their baby is ugly.

I'm not advocating eliminating your ability to smoke. You want to kill yourself quicker while makng tobacco companies richer, be my guest. But that's not my choice. And you have no right to make it my choice. It wasn't Dana Reeve's choice either.

When The Magic Disappears

Back in a former life, I worked at Disneyland. I was one of those guys who told dumb jokes on the Jungle Cruise and told you to pull your safety bars down on Big Thunder Mountain.

It'll sound corny, but I kinda bought into the whole "Disney magic" thing. I believed in the "onstage/backstage" concept. You were an entertainer. Your job was to deliver a great experience for every person that came through the gates. And there were experience you had working there that reinforced it. Some of my favorite memories are from times when I helped out in the parade area right before the fireworks. We'd get to stand (or sit) in the off-limits grass areas while the fireworks went off. The lights would dim and Tinkerbell would do her flight from the Matterhorn to her landing tower behind Big Thunder Mountain. And when she took off, it was like 20,000 people were socked in the gut at the same time. A sudden gasp and the "oohs" and "aahs", especially those of the kids, and you were seeing the magic happen.

This weekend, my wife and I decided to take our 2 1/2-year-old to Disneyland. I wanted her to start to experience that magic, and perhaps selfishly, wanted to experience myself through her. Unfortunately, the magic seems to have faded.

When Walt was asked why he wanted to create an amusement park, he made references to creating a place he could take his daughters, some place clean and family friendly.

This picture of the water in the moat at the base of Sleeping Beauty Castle is an example of what passes for "clean" nowadays. Scum from the bottom of the moat has floated up and is present throughout. The water doesn't flow, creating stagnant conditions. This scum is detritus that has accumulated, and through decomposition, created gases that cause it to float back up. We used to see this on the Jungle Cruise, but since the water moved, it was eventually sucked up into the pumps and filters.

It used to be the image of an employee with a "Disney Vacuum Cleaner" was prevalent, and the park prided itself on cleanliness. Spills were quickly cleaned up. Not so anymore. Walkways were strewn with trash, spilled popcorn, and the general evidence of crowds.

Remember the double-decker bus and horse drawn trolleys that ran up and down Main Street? Good. Because that's all we found were memories - no buses or trolleys to be seen.

We went to get lunch. We had a plate of fried chicken, a plate of pasta, a Cobb salad, and two side salads. Add in two sodas to wash it down. Cost? $56. We're not talking gourmet fare here. And this was in a cafeteria-style restaurant (Plaza Inn), where there isn't even anyone to help you find a seat.

Speaking of price, it was a damned good thing my brother had extra passes. To duplicate what he gave us (three "park-hopper" passes for adults) would have cost us nearly $240.

At the restaurant, my wife asked for a fat-free dressing. The first person spoke not one word of English. This was the person up front, dealing with guests as they walked in the door. After nearly five minutes of this, a second person came up. My wife again asked what fat-free dressings were available. This person spoke English, but had no clue. Her answer? Just get all of them out and lay them on the counter and let my wife choose.

This lack of attention to detail was all over. Shows were lackluster, with performers looking like they were just marking time. And finding someone to ask a simple question was nearly impossible. Employees spent more time talking to each other than guests.

I can't convey my disappointment strongly enough. I have literally thousands of memories, great memories of what the park should be like. I want my family to have those as well. But corporate expediency, budgetary cuts, and a blind focus on the bottom line have robbed me of these. Maybe it'll come back. I hope so. But for now, the magic seems to have disappeared.